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zakboy
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« Reply #15 on: May 30, 2011, 04:27:18 PM » |
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yes i think i would soon be off as well  |
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Give me the strength to except the things in life i can not change
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zakboy
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« Reply #16 on: May 31, 2011, 02:13:59 PM » |
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Give me the strength to except the things in life i can not change
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kevsky
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« Reply #17 on: May 31, 2011, 05:23:12 PM » |
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maybe just maybe he'd no cream in the fridge. and everybody knows you can't have apple pie without cream,your honour
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reality sucks thank god for religion
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zakboy
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« Reply #18 on: June 01, 2011, 08:26:19 PM » |
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paddys mutt
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Give me the strength to except the things in life i can not change
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klogan45
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« Reply #19 on: June 02, 2011, 09:08:08 AM » |
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A doctor heard loud screams from the treatment room in A&E, he ran in to the room saw waht the nurse was doing and shouted " Stop, stop, I said prick his boil"
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Confucius say woman who flies upside down has crack up!
He who holds The Angle Grinder of Destiny holds the fate of bikekind in his hands.
Where did that 13mm spanner go then?
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zakboy
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« Reply #20 on: June 02, 2011, 10:10:54 AM » |
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A drunken paddy collapsed at the party and as he fell he caught his chin on the keyboard of the piano, knocking him spark out. On coming round murphy asked 'Who hit you?'
'I don't know,' said paddy. 'But he had a beautiful set of teeth!'
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Give me the strength to except the things in life i can not change
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zakboy
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« Reply #21 on: June 02, 2011, 01:04:28 PM » |
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paddy said to the fishmonger......"ill take a pair of kippers please".... the fishmonger said "sorry paddy i don't have a pair"........... paddy "said OK ill take two odden,s then
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Give me the strength to except the things in life i can not change
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klogan45
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« Reply #22 on: June 02, 2011, 05:12:15 PM » |
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Paddy was working in a chip shop. A punter came in and said "Fish and chips twice, please" Paddy looked at him and said "OK, I heard you the first time"
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Confucius say woman who flies upside down has crack up!
He who holds The Angle Grinder of Destiny holds the fate of bikekind in his hands.
Where did that 13mm spanner go then?
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klogan45
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« Reply #23 on: June 02, 2011, 05:15:47 PM » |
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Paddy went to the doctor and said " I'm having terrible trouble, I go to the toilet every morning at half past seven" "What's the problem" said the doctor. Paddy said " I don't wake up untill half nine" (This was inspired by hagars post in the @Morning@ thread ) |
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Confucius say woman who flies upside down has crack up!
He who holds The Angle Grinder of Destiny holds the fate of bikekind in his hands.
Where did that 13mm spanner go then?
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zakboy
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« Reply #24 on: June 02, 2011, 06:11:41 PM » |
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Paddy and Murphy paramedics
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Give me the strength to except the things in life i can not change
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klogan45
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« Reply #25 on: June 02, 2011, 06:14:08 PM » |
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PMSL Brilliant, so that's where I've been going wrong...keep failing the cpr course.  |
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Confucius say woman who flies upside down has crack up!
He who holds The Angle Grinder of Destiny holds the fate of bikekind in his hands.
Where did that 13mm spanner go then?
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zakboy
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« Reply #26 on: June 02, 2011, 06:55:31 PM » |
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BREAKING NEWS:
Inspired by events in New York City on 9/11 it has emerged that the IRA has hijacked a hot air balloon and bounced off Canary Wharf three times.
Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night.....
To prevent the spread of Bird Flu the Irish government today announced an immediate ban on all Hen Parties
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« Last Edit: June 02, 2011, 07:17:42 PM by zakboy »
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zakboy
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« Reply #27 on: June 02, 2011, 07:53:16 PM » |
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23 people have been found glued to the ceiling and walls of a train station in Dublin............
Police believe that "Irish terrorists" have set off the first "No more nails" bomb.
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Give me the strength to except the things in life i can not change
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zakboy
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« Reply #28 on: June 03, 2011, 05:59:12 AM » |
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paddy said to the girl in the disco "do ya fancy a sh-g then" the girl said "im on my menstrual cycle" paddy "said great im on me scooter ill follow you home den"
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Give me the strength to except the things in life i can not change
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zakboy
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« Reply #29 on: June 03, 2011, 06:18:02 AM » |
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Way down in the back of beyond in Ireland, Murph's old lady had been pregnant for some time and now the time had come. He brought her to the doctor and the doctor began to deliver the baby. She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Murphy and said, "Hey, Murphy! You just had you a son! Ain't dat grand!!"
Murphy got excited by this, but just then the doctor spoke up and said, "Hold on! We ain't finished yet!"
The doctor then delivered a little girl. He said, "Hey, Murphy! You got you a daughter!!!! She a pretty lil ting, too."
Murphy got kind of puzzled by this and then the doctor said, "Hold on, we still ain't got done yet!"
The doctor then delivered another boy and said, "Murphy, you just had yourself another boy!"
Murphy said to the doctor, "Doc, what caused all of dem babies?"
The doctor said, "You never know Murphy, it was probably something that happened during conception."
Murphy said, "Ah yeah, during conception."
When Murphy and his wife went home with their three children, he sat down with his wife and said, "Mama, you remember dat night that we ran out of Vaseline and we had to use dat dere 3-in-1 Oil?"
She said, "Yeah, I remember dat night..."
Murphy said, "I'll tell you, bye, it's afookin' good ting we didn't use dat WD-40!!"
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